"There are three topics: love, death, and flies." Augusto Monterroso
A counterattack
Blow with an axe
An atrocity
189 catastrophes, 7 shots, a disaster
A conflict, 10 million explosives, 2 shots
An aberration, 750 missiles, 4 trenches
1,500 diseases, 5 murders, a war...
65,000 attacks, 100 missiles, 550 projectiles
2 shots, 1,421,000 crimes, a disaster
4 assaults, 1,000 homicides...
OPERATION PARADISE
Once, in a small place
someone scribbled the following phrase
with chalk on a wall:
“Paradise is the absence of man.”
A guy who read the phrase a few days later
found it funny
and also decided to copy it in large writing
on a wall in his town square.
And so, via this simple mechanism of transferring information
in a few months
thousands of walls were home to those six words.
That wasn't the end of it because
the phrase became a talking point among the citizens.
No evening meal with friends, bar talk,
neighbourhood gathering or open-air dance
was complete without discussing its meaning.
And over time
all the local people gradually asked themselves the same question:
"What if we leave?"
"If paradise is the absence of man...
let's go!"
"The only real possibility of turning this land
into a genuine paradise."
Intuition gave way to certainty,
and the urge to leave gradually grew bigger and bigger.
It's true that there were some hitches.
At the time, the then president of the place
insisted that "Paradise is the absence of man and woman."
But since no one really fancied arguing,
the new formula was accepted.
A few weeks later, the Parliament there
unanimously approved the call for a referendum
to vote if they wished to leave that piece of land.
The Government of the nation where that land was
did not oppose the referendum
because it didn't consider it unconstitutional.
"No one really wants to split up the country", they thought.
The campaign before voting was very dull.
Everyone supported leaving
although, admittedly, for very different reasons.
Some spoke of love for Mother Earth,
others defended the migrant traditions
of an ancient people whose origins are unknown.
Those defending wild boars saw it as an excellent way
to prevent this noble animal's extinction.
Anyway...
the referendum was carried out
and 100% of the population went to the polls
and cast a favourable vote.
Afterwards, the local Government
busied itself organising the diaspora
that was christened with the name "Operation Paradise".
Withdrawal
was to be carried out using planes
with a random destination decided
after take off,
from among the world's airports.
During the ensuing months
the basic needs of the local inhabitants were met.
Nobody worked except those in charge of the operation
or of maintaining basic services.
Nothing could be bought or sold with money.
Nobody could enter or leave the country.
All communication was cut off.
Private property was abolished
and planes could only be boarded
carrying a small suitcase with a minimum of belongings.
Symbolically,
and coinciding with when the last plane took off with the last group,
whose random destination was Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia's capital,
explosive devices reduced to ashes certain football grounds
and other emblematic buildings in the country.
It should be noted that other countries and nations
were solemnly encouraged to follow the example.
And the example spread.
First, a small Amazonian tribe
thought they should leave because there was no jungle left.
Then all the countries of Black Africa
who quickly realised they had nothing to lose.
The Chinese diaspora was a mess.
Because they were the Chosen People, the Israelis
took years to decide.
It was impossible to remove some,
who clung on tooth and nail to the Wailing Wall,
which was, incidentally,
blown up with dynamite before the last plane left.
As the years went by, the planet became void of humans,
except a small Caribbean island called Dominica,
where they were all crowded together.
Shortly after, unable to take the weight,
the island eventually sank.
Arsehole.
Arselick.
Arsewipe.
Ape.
Airhead, arsekisser
bastard, bugger, buffoon...
clueless, creep, crawler, cunt...
cheapskate, chicken, clown
chicken, crook, cheater
cockroach, chav, cocksucker
cretin, dumbwit, egghead
motherfucker, monster, minger...
THE LOVESTRUCK CUTLETS
HOMO SAPIENS AND FREE WILL
Video commentary about what Voltaire famously said:
"When nature formed our species
it gave us some instruments.
For example,
self-love for our survival,
benevolence for the survival of others,
love which is common to all the species
and the inexplicable gift
of combining more ideas than all the animals together."
When it had given us our portion
nature said to us:
"Now, do what you can."
Lawyer.
Lawyers.
Lawyers. Lawyers...
Psychology... Personal development...
House of God... Lawyers...
Psychologist... Insurance...
Illusion... Holistics...
HOMO SAPIENS AND FREE WILL
Once, in a small place,
someone scribbled the following phrase
with chalk on a wall:
"Paradise is the absence of man."
A guy who read the phrase a few days later
found it funny,
and also decided to copy it in large writing
on a wall in his town square.
And so,
via this simple mechanism of transferring information...