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Go easy will you!
- How do I look? - Awful.
If your folks have this effect on you, don't go see them!
Does your mother know I'm coming for lunch?
No, she would panic.
So that's who you get it from.
She always cooks for six, regardless.
If I were to miss another Sunday, she'd kill herself.
Yeah right!
Just a turn of phrase.
She hasn't done it yet and look at the husband she's got.
You really sure about this?
You can still change your mind.
This is the day, even the horoscope says so. I have to do it today.
And why do I have to come along? I'll drop you off, say goodbye, and go.
No, you have to help me out.
You getting ready for your Last Rites?
Yes, let's go upstairs and get our blessing.
Hallowed be thy Sunday lunch!
Tell the cold callers we're not buying!
Mama's baby boy, c'mon in!
You look so thin, you eating enough?
Ma, this is Gianluca.
Pleasure to meet you, ma'am.
Slam the door in their face and get cooking!
It's Giuseppe!
Let's go, or he won't pipe down.
I made lots of yummy things for you.
And it's good afternoon from the San Paolo stadium,
for the most anticipated game of the season.
As things stand however, a game with a number of key players missing.
With the transfer window coming up,
the club really needs to cash in and complete the squad...
Napoli have to buy some players.
And what are they waiting for, a freakin' miracle?
Hey Dad.
Well I'm honored.
And who's this?
This is Gianluca, a friend.
- Pleased to meet you. - Guess I should get up, then.
Let me help...
Your buddy here's got some muscles to him. How about you?
A bit of exercise is what you need, guys.
You gotta go work out. That's how you pull the ladies.
Mind you, he don't look like he needs it.
You seem to be in good shape, kid.
This guy's got more girls than he can handle.
Pressing. Pressing's what you gotta do.
Even your rickety old Ma's in better shape than you, son.
Gianluca, are you another one of these kids
that don't go see their parents on a Sunday?
Actually, I go once a month. We're from the Benevento area.
So you got an excuse.
Well saved, keeper!
- Talking of Benevento, did you celebrate? - What?
I bet you wept like a little girl.
I'm sorry, what do you mean?
Benevento in the big boys' league!
At least they got there, for once! For you it must be like winning the cup!
I don't go home too often, so I don't really follow it...
Sit down, it's ready.
My wife makes the best Neapolitan meat sauce.
Almost as good as a Maradona goal.
My Mom's a pretty good cook too.
Dream on, kid! You'll never get a meat sauce like this in Benevento. Take a seat!
Shall we sit?
Your plate.
Thank-you, ma'am.
You're welcome.
All the premises are in place for a positive outcome.
My compliments, Signora. This sauce is delicious.
Seriously, Ma, it's just like Grandma's.
I've been making it for 40 years, it's second nature.
Well it better be good, because if it ain't, Mama's gonna end up on the sidelines.
Right, Beppe?
Always complaining. Where you gonna find another one like me?
Never a compliment. Not one!
And suddenly one day, I fell in love with you.
Go get the meatballs, my love.
- Let me give you a hand. - No, don't worry.
Your pal ain't a fag, is he?
No, he was just kidding.
Hurry up, the game starts at 3pm.
Yes Sir!
Listen, Gianluca, do you go to church on Sunday?
Well, actually...
When I was little he always took me to church.
At the San Paolo basilica.
In Rome?
No, Fuorigrotta in Naples.
We'd go watch the 11 apostles,
and wait for Saint Diego of Buenos Aires to perform a miracle.
- Dios! - Halleluja.
Show some respect!
My son is a heretic.
He has always blackened his saint's name.
Saint Joseph?
Giuseppe Bruscolotti, the player.
I used to take him to the stadium
and he would sleep through the whole game.
What an embarrassment!
Fifty thousand people watching him sleep.
C'mon eat up, or it'll get cold.
Get a move on, I'm not sitting here another minute.
Dad, I have something I want to tell you.
Are you gonna bring the eggplant Parmigiana?
We need a little side-dish, to wash it all down.
You need money?
No, absolutely not. I don't need any money, I'm fine.
That's good, 'cause I wouldn't give you any.
Who's got any money round here?
I've been wanting to tell you something for a long time.
Luisa,
sit down.
I already know. I knew it the moment you walked in.
You even brought you pal along for solidarity.
You don't know anything, let him speak.
Oh I know alright. You knocked somebody up.
What?
- You got some girl pregnant, admit it. - No, for goodness' sake, 'course not.
Your buddy introduced you to some girls
and you screwed up 'cause you don't know how to behave.
At your age you still haven't learned.
No Dad, what are you talking about?
I'm saying that you have to marry her now,
'cause it's my family name and you have to honor it.
Let him speak, you got it all wrong, just calm down.
Oh be quiet, I'll give him a good beating is what I'll do!
I didn't get anyone pregnant, relax!
- I swear on my mother's life. - What? Don't drag me into it!
You sure?
I'm sure.
He's sure, he's sure.
You hit the post again.
That's why they used to call Bruscolotti “the iron post”!
You never score a goal, never.
At least you got Gianluca here, who'll take you to the gym.
I've been trying to pick up the courage to talk to you.
- We are talking. We always talk. - He's the only one to talk!
What, you deaf or something?
Go ahead.
No, we don't. You don't listen.
And I've never really spoken to you, I've never told you how things stand.
Let me get some salad for a bit of strength.
What do you want to say? I already know, I'm your father.
I'm not Sleeping Beauty like your mother here!
You don't know who I am. You don't know me. You don't know anything about me.
Of course I do. I saw you come into this world, saw you grow up,
and if you don't want me to see you die too, don't speak to me like that!
What? I didn't catch that.
I didn't get that, what did you say?
Speak up, I can't hear you!
Go on. Whatever happens, I'm here for you.
What did I teach you?
If you shiver in fear, you don't get to bed the pretty ladies.
You are not afraid.
Dad, I...
I support Juventus!
“To my little champion”.
All done?
What's up with him? He's normally an angel.
What do I know!?
Dad, look! The zebra, my favorite animal.
We're going to Grandma's in the country tomorrow, she's got donkeys. You're gonna love them.
But I like zebras.
You watch yourself, they're very unfriendly.
I used that softener you like.
Thanks Ma.
Beppe, are you really gonna need that?
It's not that cold!
Dad, it's New Year's Eve!
Unfortunately, with this piece of news just in, we have to interrupt the program.
Where did I go wrong?
Your drops.
A faggot for a son would've been better!
Really?
A faggot for a son would've been better!
Dad, Gianluca and I have been together for three years.
We want to get married in New York.
Your drops, your drops!
Those who love never forget.
"And suddenly one day, I fell in love with you"
"My heart was beating hard, but I can't tell you why"
And just so you know, I've got plenty of friends like that...
- Juventus fans! - Really?
"So much time has passed, and we're still here today"
- You want a cake? - No.
"I never said a word, it's time to let it out!”
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